My husband isn’t supporting me financially. What do I do?

Written by: Bridget Daniels Carlson
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April 13, 2012 · DEAR MILITARY SPOUSE · Tags: · 2,465 views

Q. Hello, I’m a 19 year old military wife. My husband has told me a while back that he stopped receiving his military pay. People laughed in my face saying that I needed to call up the financial office up at Fort Jackson and find out what was really going on cause he should still be receiving pay. Turns out they were right. I just found out he has had a stash. I feel like an idiot, constantly believing he was broke and coming up with money for the bills on my own with my 3.12 dollars an hr pay. I just would like to know who to call in this situation. Do i need a lawyer or call up the military dept.

First, you say you only make $3.12/hr? I don’t know where you work, but it sounds like they are violating the Fair Labor Standards Act (FLSA). I’d find a better job and report them to your local WHD office!

Second, I am not sure who you spoke with, but finance will NOT give that kind of information over the phone. Furthermore, they very rarely will even speak to a spouse unless that spouse shows up in person with a power of attorney that states she may speak to finance on the Soldiers behalf. It sounds like he is a new Soldier? If that is the case, the Military very often does screw up pay. Heck it tends to get screwed up anytime there is a change in the Soldiers life, such as moving, getting married, getting promoted, etc… One quick way is to just look at his LES. If you don’t have his login info for MyPay, ask him to create you a sign in so you can login and check his LES every month.

However, I’m assuming from your email, you are now looking to get a divorce? In that case, you would need to contact a lawyer. As for him, as long as he is married he has a duty to support you. Failure to do so can cause him to get in trouble (which from the sounds of your email, that is what you are seeking to do as well). I will tell you straight out, I am VERY against messing with a Military members career, no matter what they have done (unless they are failing to provide child support for a child). How would you like it if you had a career and your spouse did everything possible to get you fired from it? I just think it is outright childish to do. However, if that is what you wish to do, you would need to contact his chain of command to let them know he is not supporting you financially. Then, it’s really up to their discretion on what they want to do about it.

Anyway, I hope that you were just given misinformation. If that turns out to be the case and your husband has been telling you the truth, I’d get rid of those friends of yours that tried to put doubts in your mind. You don’t need friends like that. Instead, surround yourself with friends who support both you and your marriage, no matter what ups and downs you may have. A real friend doesn’t put doubts in your mind about your husband (or your marriage) no matter what may be happening. And you can take that from someone who has a lot of experience in that department!

Good luck to you!

Bridget Daniels Carlson (149 Posts)

Bridget is a Mother to 4 and has been a Military Wife for 13 years. She is the author of the Dear Military Spouse column which currently appears on the USMC Hangout website and Examiner.com where she is the National Military Marriage Examiner. She is outspoken, loves a good debate, and doesn't like when people beat around the bush. She's never had a problem "telling it like it is". FTC Disclaimer About Reviews: The Company or Publisher has provided me with a complimentary copy of this book or product unless otherwise stated in the review. However, I will always give my honest opinion of any book or product I review, no matter the circumstances in which I received it.



April 13, 2012 · DEAR MILITARY SPOUSE · Tags: · [Print] · 2,465 views

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