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Military Wedding Tips and Regulations

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Are you engaged to a Marine? Are you planning on having a military wedding? Below you will find rules and traditions of a Marine Corps Wedding. Whether you decide to have a full blown out military wedding or a half military and half traditional, the info below will help you get started. You should always check with you local base protocol officer to find out what wedding requirements there are in place, since rank as well as the military branch you are enlisted in have different protocols.

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WEDDING ATTIRE

Probably the main distinction of a military wedding is that the bride and/or groom, as well as service members in the wedding party, usually wear their uniforms. The type of uniform depends on the style of the wedding, the time of day, and the season:

Evening dress uniform (blue in winter, white in summer) is worn for an ultra-formal wedding (i.e., a white-tie affair).

Dinner or "mess dress" uniform is appropriate at a formal or semiformal event (comparable to black-tie).

Dress blues or whites are worn for less formal weddings; they are equivalent to a nice suit or a cutaway coat.

Any non-military wedding-party members simply wear traditional wedding clothes of the same level of formality as those in uniform.

Some additional tips:

Bride and bridesmaids: The bride can wear her uniform (and so can any bridesmaids), but many military brides opt for a traditional white wedding dress. Bridesmaids might wear navy bridesmaids' gowns to complement the colors of the men's uniforms, or any other color dress the bride prefers.

Groom and groomsmen: If any ushers are members of a different service than the groom (Army instead of Navy, for example), they simply wear a uniform of comparable formality to his. The groom and best man do not wear gloves because they will be handling the rings, but the other ushers wear white gloves throughout the ceremony. Boutonnieres are never worn with uniforms; instead, officers wear their military decorations.

Parents: Should the fathers of the bride or groom be active or retired officers, they may wear uniforms. So may mothers, although they usually choose to wear traditional mother-of-the-bride attire.

Guests: Military guests (active or retired) may wear their uniforms or traditional formal attire. Put "Full dress uniform invited" on the invites to request that your guests come in uniform.

INVITATIONS

Military wedding invitations follow the same general guidelines used for civilian weddings. The main difference is in the use of titles. The bride's/groom's rank and service, and that of any of their parents, is included. Traditionally, brides who are members of the military have not used their titles on the invitations.

Here are the basics and some examples.

If the bride, groom, or both are senior officers (Captain and up), their titles appear before their names, followed by the branch or service on the line below:

Captain Joshua Kent Clark
United States Marine Corps

If the bride, groom, or both are junior or company-grade officers, their titles appear under their names, followed by the branch of service on the same line:

Joshua Kent Clark

Second Lieutenant, United States Marine Corps

For enlisted personnel, rank is usually omitted. The full name is written on one line, with the branch of service underneath. "Mr." is never used to address or refer to an officer on active duty.

Joshua Kent Clark

United States Marine Corps

Retired officers (generally this refers to parents of the bride and/or groom), especially in the rank of Lieutenant Colonel, generally keep their titles in civilian life and use them on wedding invitations, *only* noting that they are retired if the invitation is issued in their name alone:

Lieutenant Colonel Joshua Kent Clark Sr.

United States Marine Corps, Retired

requests the honor of your presence...

When officers' names are used with their spouse's name, the branch of service is not mentioned on the line underneath.

Lieutenant Colonel and Mrs. Joshua Kent Clark Sr.

request the honor of your presence...

Military titles should never be abbreviated. Example:

Lieutenant General and Mrs. Joshua Kent Clark Sr.

request the pleasure of your company

at the marriage of their daughter

Captain Cindy Marie Clark

United States Marine Corps

to

Major David Lee Miller

United States Marine Corps

son of

Captain and Mrs. Hunter James Miller

Saturday, the fifth of January

at two o' clock

Marine Corps Memorial Chapel

Quantico, Virginia

Outside envelopes should be addressed with full names, no abbreviated titles:

Major and Mrs. Joshua Kent Clark

Captain David Lee Miller

The inner envelope is addressed:

Major and Mrs. Clark

Captain Miller

An invitation to a married couple with the same rank and service:

Captains Joshua and Monica Miller

The Captains Miller

In different services, different ranks, when the wife has retained her maiden name:

Major Monica Blue

Captain Jack Nue

Major Blue and Captain Nue

In different services, different ranks, when the couple has the same last name:

Captain Jack and Major Monica Nue

Captain and Major Nue

A note on the guest list: Depending on the size of the couple's station, commanding officers, their spouses and all or some of the staff officers (and their wives or husbands) should be invited to the wedding.

CEREMONY LOCATION

Many military weddings take place at military chapels. If you'd like to use another location, run it by your installation. Most military chapels are like other in-demand ceremony sites -- you need to reserve them at least a year ahead of time, often by applying in writing to the chaplain's office. There will probably be no charge for the use of the chapel, but a donation to the chapel fund will be expected. The average donation amount is $50-$60.

Rules for decorating military chapels vary across the country, but all flowers, candelabra, and other decor are arranged by the Chapel Altar Guild and are the same for all weddings. Some chapels and churches do not furnish decorations; the couple plans them themselves.

OFFICIATE

If you marry in a military chapel, the chaplain will perform your ceremony, and when you reserve the chapel you'll arrange a meeting. A few sessions of pre-wedding counseling may also be required. If you'd like your civilian clergyperson to co-officiate, talk to both officiates early about the possibility. Chaplains are commissioned officers and are paid by the service they represent; you do not need to pay them a fee (although you should make a donation to the chapel; see above). It's customary to offer any assisting civilian clergyman an honorarium.

THE ARCH OF SWORDS

After the ceremony the newlyweds walk through an arch of swords. The arch is not mandatory, but it's definitely a memorable part of a military ceremony. On most bases, at least one chapel or an honor guard usually has swords available for wedding ceremonies. Another possible source is the local ROTC unit. The arch is usually formed outside of the church or chapel; traditionally, a sword should never be unsheathed inside a religious sanctuary.

Only commissioned officers, SNCOs and NCOs can carry swords and participate in this ceremony. Often the military groomsmen participate, but other officers (guests, perhaps) may be designated to help create the arch. Usually 6-8 officers are included. The head usher usually issues the commands, starting with "CENTER FACE," the signal to form two facing lines. When the order "BRIDGE SWORDS" is given, each usher raises his sword, cutting edge up, to form the arch. Officers have been known to detour from tradition, announcing the couple ("Ladies and gentlemen, may I present Corporal and Mrs. Ware") or lowering the final two swords to block the couple's way and demand that they kiss!

A Marine Corps tradition, is for the last sword bearer to "tap" the bride with his sword and say, "Welcome to the Marine Corps, Ma'am."

THE RECEPTION

Military receptions at bases are often held at officers' or enlisted clubs on the installation, or you can have a traditional hotel or restaurant reception. Military guests are traditionally shown to their seats in order of rank. You might play at bit of regimental music, including the theme song of the bride's and/or groom's branch of service.

Decorations could include American flags and/or the standards of your unit(s) in addition to flowers.

The highlight of a military reception comes when the bride and groom cut the cake using a sword, one belonging to the groom if he owns one. The groom presents it to the bride and she cuts a slice of the wedding cake with the groom's right hand resting over hers.

THINGS TO REMEMBER:

If having ceremony on base:  get permission for photographers, caterers, etc.. to enter base

Always check with your base protocol officer for the latest regulations

Wedding favors and bridal shower favors


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July 18, 2001